Betrayal. What an ugly, cold word. Judas betrayed Christ, William Wallace was betrayed by a comrade in a battle trying to free Scotland, and Benedict Arnold turned his back on America to join the British. These kinds of betrayals brings gasps and twisted faces as people recount the stories.
Recently a friend told me to check out a sermon online. The preacher covered a number of topics in his endeavor to drive home a thought about the Christian life, but he specifically mentioned betrayal. I began to really ponder that word since I had just taught a Bible lesson on it. With a little research, I found it is OFTEN connected with Love. The two words seem to be complete opposites because people casually throw the two together to emphasize the extreme. Actually, the relationship represented in the analogy illustrates that betrayal stems from the act of NOT loving.
We've all been there. The small betrayals start in grade school when your best friend of all time jumps ship and becomes friends with the class enemy just to get a better lunch to trade. Then Middle School nightmares of friends betraying our undying love to the boy in Science class cause us to imagine many ways to kill the enemy silently and without mess. Later in life those moments become way more serious, and we find ourselves at crossroads of desperation, many times completely destroyed and without reason to live. Someone we completely trusted with heart and soul has left us uncovered in the wind, shocked beyond realization, and we find ourselves at the bottom of the shower floor in feeling completely forsaken. One man told me that he lay on the floor for three days not moving when his wife left him. Another woman went into human hibernation for several months when her mate left her for another, accepting no contact from anyone. She lost her job over her avoidance. A scene in a movie shows a woman lying on the floor of her bathroom, hugging the toilet for hours, representing that she was at her lowest and just didn't care anymore all because someone betrayed her from her past.
Betrayal kills the soul, doesn't it? Some people come out of it, some don't. What makes the difference? Trust.
This is my main sin that I have to deal with on a daily basis. I don't trust enough. I used to be labeled in my family "the gullible child." I believed all the inane jokes, never getting the punch line because I would fall at the very beginning. I've been laughed at many times. Life teaches us sometimes hard lessons, doesn't it? And we learn to doubt and wonder BEFORE the happening, and that just isn't good most of the time. But we aren't talking about trusting in people here--people WILL let you down. We are to TRUST GOD that He knows what He's doing.
JOB 39:11 Wilt thou trust him, because his strength is great? or wilt thou leave thy labour to him?
PSALM 9:10 And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, LORD, hast not forsaken them that seek thee
What a thought that God will not forsake us! We are so used to man letting us down, that we become cynical at times with our Creator! The God who is in control of everything--how prideful of us to even doubt Him at all! Pride seems to be the root of a bunch of sins, and "NOT TRUSTING" because we are angry, sad, bitter and despondent because someone has betrayed us is a branch of Pride. My students and I webbed it and talked it out. There is no way around it. We cannot control the circumstance, but we CAN control the outcome. And no one can really explain this unless you have been in the hot seat of betrayal. It is the lowest of the low.
Recently in my counseling I have heard the following:
"God cannot use me anymore."
"My mom and I fight. We fist fight. She hates me."
"I'm embarrassed to admit...."
These are lies of Satan who is the master CREATOR of pride. He did it first, and he's had several thouand years to perfect his evil sin. He is an infector, a destroyer, and a liar. If you are telling yourself a lie anywhere similar to these, realize that it is not from God, it is from the Devil. You do matter to God. IF you are a saved, born again, Christian, HE has a plan for you. Period. Yes, life gets in the way. Yes, some people get dealt painful blows that seem unfathomable. No, it isn't fair. But some people trust God and come out the other side---with scars, yes---but living. They didn't give in. They trusted.
I have to put my money where my mouth is one of these days at a theme park here in Florida. We have a roller coaster that is straight up in the air with a 3 second suspension at the peak before falling straight down. Fear has kept me from succeeding. Last year I was strapped in with some of my students who helped me get that far, and I unbuckled and bailed. It is a small thing that has become very big to me. Having fear and trusting God in something that I can't control is one thing. Fear over a roller coaster drop when I CAN control riding it at least once is quite another, and I'm tired of being afraid. **We'll see!**
Don't shut people out because you have become a cynical Christian because of bitterness. I'm so sorry that someone or something has caused you to hurt. That friend who hurt you probably doesn't even realize what they have done. Forgive them quietly so that you can free yourself from the chains that bitterness creates.
Some of my married friends who are on "round 2" are so precious because they have made it through a nasty situation of distrust, lies, and betrayal. My own betrayal has not been in marriage but in another avenue of life, and no one can quite know EXACTLY how you feel unless they have been there. I admire people so much when they stay in the ministry, stay involved in church, and just don't quit on life even though they have gone through such devastation. Remember that the Lord loves you, and that you matter. YOU matter to God. HIS own SON this very week faced the ultimate betrayal that cost Him His life. But imagine our lives without Christ!! Imagine that if Christ had not gone through the suffering, we would not have the grace...the grace needed to have eternity in Heaven. I wonder who you are going to help "live" because of you are MAKING IT THROUGH THE SUFFERING. Don't quit. You matter to someone. You definitely matter to God.
PSALM 139: 1-51 O LORD, thou hast searched me, and known me. 2 Thou knowest my downsitting and mine uprising , thou understandest my thought afar off.3 Thou compassest my path and my lying down, and art acquainted with all my ways.4 For there is not a word in my tongue, but, lo, O LORD, thou knowest it altogether. 5 Thou hast beset me behind and before, and laid thine hand upon me.
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